The recent events surrounding Bishop Weeks make it clear that domestic violence is present in the church at all levels and it is being swept under a rug:

Statistics from many studies, both secular and Christian, show that on any Sunday approximately twenty-five percent of the women sitting in the pews with us are victims of domestic abuse. That behavior can range from verbal and economic abuse, to sexual and physical violence. Link.

Until recently, the Christian community has lived in denial that domestic crime and brutality could be present in their congregations. After all, we have been taught from the pages of Holy Writ that if a woman submits to her husband, or a man sacrificially loves his wife, all will be well in Domestic Tranquility Baptist Church.But this Pollyanna perspective forgets another Biblical doctrine, the existence of evil. Evil does not reside just in the heart of a slobbering rapist lurking on a dark street corner, but its also resident in the homes of some of our most respected church members and leaders.

Part of this abuse that is being tolerated in our churches stems from the fact that people misconstrue scriptures. Jesus has a bride. His bride is the Church. Can you imagine Him abusing His bride? Of course not. And neither should men. Yet, abuse is happening in the churches and it is being ignored in many cases.

It is truly alarming the number of Christian women who actually defend the right  of a man to attack and batter his wife. Women are told to just go and pray about it. Prayer is a powerful weapon.

Believe that. But there are times when we are so spiritual that we are no earthly good to ourselves or anyone else. If a man is beating a woman, of course she should pray for him. But more important, she needs to pray for herself and as soon as humanly possible, she needs to FLEE.

No woman deserves to be slapped, pushed, bitten, punched, kicked, stomped or threatened. And Christian men do not have a free pass to beat on their own wives. That is not what submit means. People forget that the scriptures say that couples should submit one to another.  But even if the submission were only on the part of the woman, she still does not deserve abuse.

Domestic abuse and violence is dangerous. Approximately ten percent of verbal abuse will progress to physical violence. Many abused spouses will die at the hand of their significant other at all levels of society, in the church and out.

Research shows that most spiritual leaders are woefully unprepared to deal with domestic abuse. Pastors are reluctant to incorporate community resources into their care plan for the victims within the congregation. Al Miles in his book, Domestic Violence, What Every Pastor Needs to Know, reveals that the theological training and beliefs given most clergy can actually contribute to increased violence and abuse of the victim.

If you are reading this article and you are a victim of abuse (or know a victim)there is hope:

a. Start planning your escape. You may not have the money right away to get out

b. Do not depend on your church to help. Some churches do. Many will not. Some will offer to counsel you. That is great but you need to still be apart from him for your own safety.

c. If you do not have family who can help you, remember that there are shelters that will help.

d. The police are there to help you. Call if you need to and press charges. Follow through with charges.

e. Restraining orders will not protect you really. He still can approach you. Therefore, if he is really violent and dangerous, go into hiding. Remember, shelters will help you.

f. Here is a website that will give you more guidance:

The Black Church and Domestic Violence Institute

Quotes from this article are from:  SOURCE